The Purina Diet
I was in Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina for Harley and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog........ Duh!
I was feeling a bit crabby so on impulse, I told her no, I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care unit with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms. Her eyes about bugged out of her head.
I went on and on with the bogus diet story and she was totally buying it.
I told her that it was an easy, inexpensive diet and that the way it works is to load your pockets or purse with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The package said the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall guy behind her.
Horrified, she asked if something in the dog food had poisoned me and was that why I ended up in the hospital.
I said no.....I'd been sitting in the street licking my butt when a car hit me.
I thought the tall guy was going to have to be carried out the door.
12 comments:
good one
People come up with some funny stuff.
hysterical. margo
ROFLMAO!!! :-))
That is one of the funniest things I've ever read. Thank You. Regards, Bill
This is way to funny! I keep laughing! Love and prayers, Penny http://journals.aol.com/firestormkids04/FromHeretoThere
I can't believe you pulled that off. Good One. She actually listened? Gullible. :)
http://journals.aol.com/mrsm711/LatteDah/ Tracy
Holy crap. woman!! That was brilliant!!
Russ
LMAO........oh my you crack me up...one time i was at the grocery line and i was with my boys..three of them..she asked me if they had the same father....OK..so yah, I went into toxic shock syndrome.....Iam thinkin...WHAT? DID YOU SAY?..I guess some minority mixing in my bloodlines got some stereotypes...I simply replied no...I am normally a bit more clever but I was too shocked to say anything...I should have said, they all have different fathers but I dont know their name....maybe one day I will know after I go down my blackbook list and play enni menni mini moe.....-Raven
OMG that's hysterical. Thanks for the morning laugh.
Deb
funny, nothing like a good joke before work. LOL.
I love laughing my arse off first thing in the morning... thank you
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