Someone needs you.

If you haven't been there the past 2 days, please go to Pamela's journal  "Just One Girls Head Noise".  She can use all the love, support, and prayers that AOL J-Land has to offer.

Another Year

 

Happy Birthday to me!

*thanks Suzy for the tag.

Friday!

Right now the house is quite.  No phones ringing.  Cats are behaving. 

Actually Sophie is curled up asleep on my feet and Sadie is curled up on my mouse pad.

I knew Sadie didn't feel well but I was trying to put off taking her to the vet because Dr B is on vacation this week.  I decided that I couldn't wait until next week.  We saw Dr H instead (they are in the same practice).  Sadie has a really bad infection in her mouth/throat area and that is why she hasn't been eating and drinking so little.  Dr H gave her some fluids, 3 shots and some meds for me to give her at home.

I now have 2 cats that I have to get meds into twice a day.  Talk about fun!

Yesterday after taking mom to the doctor  (the tests didn't show anything but they will run more later) I started in on the funeral arrangements for my aunt.  I went to the florist to pick out flowers for the top of the casket.  I picked brightly colored spring type flowers with some roses mixed in (Aunt E loved roses).  The off to the funeral home.  After showing me the prices of all the services (ready to faint here!) he showed me the coffins I had to choose from.  This was totally depressing.  And having to keep in mind prices made it worse.  I didn't want to pick out the cheapest thing but couldn't go too high either. (Luckily my aunt had bought and paid for her plot, marker and vault.)  After picking everything out and writing the obit for the newspaper I was off to the grave yard to sign even more papers.  The only thing I had to come up with money for was the opening and closing of the grave.  Because the funeral is on Saturday it cost an extra $100 for a total of about $856!  Why in the heck do you have to pay so much for digging a grave?  Didn't she pay enough to buy the plot?  By now I am tired, upset, my anxeity is out the wa-hoo.  Came home and gave Sophie her meds and then vegged out on the couch until I fell asleep.

Anyways, the funeral is tomorrow.  We are just having a grave side service.  Aunt E had always said she didn't want her coffin to be open.  In honoring her words there seemed no point in having a "viewing" night.  So the service is at 10:30 am tomorrow.  Hopefully the family will like the flowers and coffin that I picked out.  It was not an easy task.

Next week I will have to start "tying up the loose strings" of my Aunt's things  ......banking account, social security, her retirement from the bank, seeing if we will have to pay anything back to medicaid, figuring out what to do with her will.........but I will take Wednesday off.  Why?  Because Wed is my birthday and I am selfish.  I don't want to have to worry about anyone or anything except ME on that day.

Kathy

 

When it rains it pours.

My little kitty Sophie is sick.  She has some "poopy" problems and I have to get meds into her. And I have to clean her after she goes and put onintment on her down there. Talk about fun.  The vet also thinks she is younger than the 2 months, he thinks she is only 6 weeks old.

Mom is supposed to have a colonscopy tomorrow.  She is not looking forward to it.  At 3:00pm today she had to start taking the laxatives to prepare for procedure.  She is having fun too.  LOL

Hospice called today to say that my aunt was worse and they were starting to give her morphine every couple of hours to make sure she wasn't in any pain.  They said she could die within hours or days.  I went around 3:30 pm to see her.  She wasn't really "there".  Her breathing was kind of hard.  My Aunt M went around 5:30 to see her and was there went my Aunt E stopped breathing.  Hopsice was called in to say that she had indeed pasted.

Tomorrow morning I will take mom for her colonscopy, then around 2:00pm go to the funeral home to make arrangements.

Kathy

Saturday

I knew that Dallas had not been feeling well so I had planned to take her to the vet sometime during the week.  When I woke up Tuesday morning I found 2 places where she had thrown up blood.  It really threw me.  I rushed her to Dr B and he said there was a mass in her intestines.  It wasn't there a few months ago when he checked her out.  He said that it was her time.  It was really hard.  I stayed with her until she had passed.  I was crying and Dr B was trying to hold back the tears.

I had Dallas cremated the same as I did Ashley.  If you click here you can see what their "urns" look like.  I have Ashley in the sitting one and Dallas in the one laying down.  (this isn't the real ones, just a picture I found on the net.)

Sadie poor baby, she misses Dallas.  She hasn't eatten as well the past few days and just seems lost somehow.  I thought that maybe I should go ahead and get her a new buddy.  So yesterday I got a kitten from the local animal shelter.  The kitten is almost all black and looks a lot like Sadie.  She is approx 2 months old.  I have named her Sophie.

Right now Sadie doesn't care for Sophie.  She doesn't want to be around her and if she is she is hissing and meowing and chasing little Sophie.  Hopefully this won't last long.  I can't take it if it does.

On the lighter side.......my birthday is coming up soon.  I am going to be old.  Well not old but middle aged.  I sure don't feel my age on most days.

Kathy

Dallas

 

 

 

  

                     Dallas

      ?/86 - 6/7/05

I'm still alive!

It has been awhile since my last post.  Can't believe it has been so long.  Thanks to those that emailed me to see how I was doing.

I have had a problem with depression and anxiety for years and every so often my meds quit working and we have to find something new to try.  That is what is going on basically.  Doc has tried some things but nothing is doing much yet.

My anxiety is the worst it has ever been.  I haven't been able to go places and do things I was doing.  I know it will pass or we will hit on some meds that will help.  It is just taking time.

Also, because I have been on disabilty for awhile Social Security is re-evaluating my "status" and it isn't helping my depression or anxiety one bit.  I have to go to one of their doctor's on Wednesday.

My aunt is doing a lot of sleeping.  I am not sure but I think it has to do with some of her medical problems.  She really doesn't reconize anyone and is still not really eating anything.

I will try to update more often and add to my other journals soon.  I just haven't felt up to it lately.